Novelicious - The Female Fiction and Chick Lit Blog

Novelicious Undiscovered 2012 is Live!

Now you get to see why team Novelicious have been a bit giddy these past few weeks. Click on the picture to get all the juicy details about The Novelicious Undiscovered 2012 Competition!

Novelicious Undiscovered - Real Wild One by Caroline Frear

Hello and welcome to another Writer's Tuesday and another excerpt from an (as yet) unpublished writer. This week's fantastic excerpt comes from Caroline Frear. Enjoy!

ABOUT CAROLINE

About me!  Well, I'm 31, massively in love and I wile away my daylight hours working as a Recruitment Consultant in the City which is a thankless and horrible profession at the moment but it provides me with lots of material! Being paid to interview people for a living certainly helps the budding writer!  I started writing in earnest earlier this year when I suddenly hit on the idea that if I left one recruitment firm and went to a competitor, I'd immediately be put on 6 weeks garden leave and that would give me enough time to at least start the story that's been living in my head for the past 18 months.  I definitely broke the back of it in those 6 weeks and also developed a physical dependancy on Loose Women so strong that shock of going back to work nearly killed me!  So I'm back at the grindstone now and hoping for a bout of swine flu so I can lay low at home for another while and carry on with the writing.
 
I'm having a ball with the story and I'm following the advice of all the good'uns to write what I'd like to read and therefore my heroine/s eat scotch eggs and pork scratchings, pick their toenails in the bath and depsite their best attempts not to, resent their friends successes and good fortune.
 
My skin is as thick as it is pale so I invite everyone to do their worst, hold no punches and criticise away!  I haven't shown anyone yet, absolutely no one, so it would be fab just to know that it's basically ok (although I'd much prefer you say it's 'fabulous', 'ground-breaking' , ' awe-inspiring'.....yeah well, you gotta have a dream :)

EXCERPT OF REAL WILD ONE BY CAROLINE FREEAR

Chapter 1

It’s quite fitting that Aiden and I began our unholy alliance on St Paddy’s Day.  A day traditionally associated with decadence, silliness and much, much booze has spawned a relationship that seems to be following along a very similar vein.

 It took just 45 minutes to get from the initial ‘How do you do?’ to the more honest ‘How do you want me?’  - a question that Aiden expertly answered by bending me over the fire stairs at the back of The Merry Kerryman.  

I’m not exactly proud of my behaviour but neither am I ashamed. It wasn’t sordid or seedy.  It was just two people instantly recognising that they could mercifully skip all that courting malarkey, the bit where you dance around each other like two Mills & Boon protagonists desperately trying to prove your honourable intentions while your loins are screaming at you to get a bloody wriggle on.   Aiden and I, being possessed of horny bodies and sound minds, cut quickly to the chase as it just seemed like the most natural and normal thing to do.  This randy lunatic is my soulmate, I’m sure of it.

Quite simply, I am demented with lust.  Absolutely demented.  Beside myself with longing.  Driven mad with the unflinching need to feel his flesh against mine.  It never goes away, not even when I sleep.  It ferments in my stomach like a late night curry, waking me during the night and leaving me queasy and exhausted the next day. In the same way that grief or shock can sucker-punch you to the point that you can’t even remember your own name, as a woman in lust, I’m not fairing much better.  I feel permanently drained and yet never more alive, totally numb but sensitive to every colour and sound that surrounds me.  I’m a walking contradiction and a walking hard-on and quite frankly I’m finding this physical epiphany really quite knackering.  I’m totally worn out from shagging, screwing, spooning, sucking, screaming, squatting, swallowing and a whole host of other ‘ings’ that I could think of if I wasn’t so dog-tired.  

I ‘m neither use nor ornament to anyone.  I can’t even cope with the most basic of tasks. Paying credit card bills, peeling carrots, painting toenails, checking lottery numbers, you name it, if it doesn’t involve a partially clothed Aiden Costello  then I have no inclination or motivation to involve myself.  In the past two weeks, I’ve forgotten Christy’s birthday (which may be reluctantly forgiven but never forgotten), I’ve gone nearly 24hrs without eating a morsel of food - this from a woman who was once the scourge of the ‘all you can eat buffet’ and last night, I didn’t even flare up at the words ‘replacement bus service’ when I stumbled, delirious and intimately bruised into Waterloo station.  It’s like I’m incapable of feeling any emotion, good or bad, unless he’s near me.  Unless he’s inside me.

Novelicious Undiscovered - The Love Spell by Suzanne Farmer

Hello and welcome to another week of Writers' Tuesday and Novelicious Undiscovered. This week's excerpt comes from Suzanne Farmer. Enjoy, and remember that any feedback is appreciated in the comments section!

ABOUT SUZANNE

I’m a self employed freelancer (age, over 18, is as much as I’m saying!) who spends my working days writing, editing and proofing UK business publications. Have been actively pursuing my dream of getting my fiction writing published for several years now and The Love Spell is my third (unpublished) novel – currently being fine tuned (i.e. cut, added to and then cut again) to within an inch of its life!  I’m a member of the aspiring writers group, the New Writers Scheme, which is run by the Romantic Novelists Association and live in hope… well, you have to, don’t you, if you want to be a writer?

EXCERPT OF THE LOVE SPELL BY SUZANNE FARMER

Kat stood at the door of the ramshackle shed and shivered. It might be summer and the day had been scorching hot but now, approaching midnight in the middle of an allotment site, her feet were absolutely freezing. Thinking about it, sandals probably weren’t the best form of footwear for an occasion such as this. Especially as ominous looking clouds had been slowly filling the sky since early evening and thunder was now rumbling in the distance.

Glancing across at Summer, who was still busy gathering assorted plants, her arms full of huge bunches of greenery, Kat wondered for the about the hundredth time exactly why she’d agreed to go along with her friend’s bizarre idea to come down here. OK, something needed to be done but was this really the answer? Shifting from one foot to the other to try to get the circulation going again Kat felt another shiver work its way up her spine. She didn’t really believe in all of this but, well, any port in a storm, as they say. Plus, Summer was her boss at the charity shop as well as her friend so she’d kind of felt obliged to tag along and offer moral as well as practical support.

Shoving a handful of lavender into a carrier bag Summer straightened up. “OK, I think we’re about ready.” Walking across to the corner of the allotment plot where the bonfire was now nothing more than glowing embers, a shadow of its former self, she nodded and grinned. “Yes, we’re definitely ready.”

Kat nodded and smiled unconvincingly. Summer might be ready but she most definitely wasn’t. She really wished that she’d never agreed to any of this. Kat ballowed her gaze to drift first to the left, out across the emptiness and semi darkness, and then to the right, towards Summer. She shivered again. This place was beyond creepy. It was bizarre that the two of them were all alone in the middle of Netherton Meadows allotment site at gone eleven o’clock at night. It was even more bizarre that Summer was wearing a glittery sequined silver vest top perfect for teaming with jeans and sky scraper heels whilst you danced the night away at a party. On this occasion though the silver top was teamed with denim shorts and a pair of bright pink wellies. Summer had what you might generously call an unusual sense of style at the best of times but this latest ensemble, well…

“Summer, can I ask you something?” Kat shouted across the allotment from her perch just inside the shed door where, for some, reason she felt safer.

Straightening up, left hand on her hip, Summer nodded. “Sure.”

“Why the sparkly top? It just seems an odd choice for what we’re about to do.”

“Silver is a colour that’s said to be sacred to the moon and helps reflect negativity away.” Glancing across the allotment site to where a crane and some scaffolding towered above the perimeter fence Summer added, “And let’s face it. We have lots of negativity to get rid of around here thanks to Harson Field Developments.”

Novelicious Undiscovered - It's Not My Thighs, It's Just Bad Lighting by Vicki Wilson

Our Novelicious Undiscovered feature is picking up where it left off and will be running until the summer when will be awarding the most commented/talked about excerpt an award and a lovely trophy!

If you would like to have an excerpt of your unpublished Chick Lit novel published on the site, then please email kirsty@novelicious.com  for more details. There is a waiting list so please be aware that you may have to wait before your excerpt is featured!

You can read our previous Undiscovered entries here.

Our excerpt this week comes from Vicki Wilson, a freelance and fiction writer who lives in New York. You can visit her website here!

Enjoy! Any constructive criticism or thoughts are welcome in the comments section.

ABOUT THE BOOK

Alice Nelson is a single, 28-year-old, 27-pounds-overweight, drug rep. For Erecticil. The erectile dysfunction drug. So when she's not enduring smirks from secretaries in the doctors' offices where she peddles her wares, she's killing herself at the gym to lose those 27 pounds that she thinks are the root of everything drab in her life.
 
Some might call Alice cynical; others with a kinder, gentler tongue — like her soon-to-be-divorced best friend Kath, who's sleeping with the mailman — would say Alice just needs a confidence boost. Either way, Alice's life is screaming for an overhaul. When she’s faced with losing her job because of a terrible mistake, she realizes she needs to get her priorities straight. A beautiful, sad young widow Alice befriends at the gym and the mailman's brother, a pediatrician, might just be the right people to help her see that it’s not the size of her thighs, but her heart, that matters.

EXCERPT OF IT'S NOT MY THIGHS, IT'S JUST BAD LIGHTING BY VICKI WILSON

  

There it is: full frontal nudity in my hotel bathroom. I stand in the tub, shower door open, and, across from me, a mirror the size of a Jackson Pollock mural doesn’t steam up; it’s some sort of fancy heated model that prevents fogging. So, I see myself, my whole self (except for my shins and my feet), in a way that I haven’t in probably 10 years. Oh boy. This is bad.
    What makes me decide to turn around to check out my ass is still a mystery. But it’s definitely worse.
    “Shit.” It’s all I can think of to say.
    Luckily, I am on my way home from this hellish hotel, from this pointless pharmaceutical conference where you had to eat every meal standing up, which means you hardly eat anything at all. And then, you order room service when you get back to your room (alone) and there’s no one there to see that you’ve eaten your entire cheeseburger, fries, and even the coleslaw, which no one ever eats.
    What is cellulite?
    So, yeah, I’m going home today after three days of conferencing (“conferencing” now a real word because so many people host these things).
    I need a new job.
    I need a new life.
    I wrap myself in an oversized hotel towel. It dwarfs me. I look much better. There should be a warning in the shower: Apply Large Towel Before Exiting Bath.
    But I don’t blame the lack of warning signs or even the non-fogging mirror. I blame the lighting. It’s that yellow unnatural overhead light. Who wouldn’t have cellulite in shoddy conditions like this?
    I step onto the fancy heated stone floor and turn the brass knob of one of the faucets over the double sink.
    It’s not my thighs, I say to my reflection. It’s just bad lighting.
    That’s it.
    My whole life is just poorly lit.

Novelicious Undiscovered - Sorry Charlie by Kimberly Murphy

Hello and welcome to another writers' Tuesday, and of course another showcase excerpt from an aspiring women's fiction writer! This week the excerpt comes from Kimberly Murphy!

Please do comment as the writer's of these pieces really do appreciate the feedback!

About Kimberly Murphy

Born in Virginia Beach, VA, raised in Raleigh, NC, and now residing in Myrtle Beach, SC, Kimberly Murphy is an abundance of personalities wrapped into one: a doting mother, hopeful writer, exasperated real estate agent, loyal mate and encouraging friend.  She spends her days working in the world of land and monetary investments, and her nights with her family or friends, drawing joy, anger, comedy and dispair from her own real life experiences as parallels for her work.

 

About the Book

Sorry Charlie is about an ambitious 30-something, fearless in her accomplishments, but terrified of relationships.  However, after being dubbed “a serial dater” by her two closest gals, past experience and future engagements make her realize the opportunities she’s thrown to the wayside and she prepares for the challenge of her life: falling in love.  Will she ever be able to commit?  Or will every relationship end with those infamous last words, Sorry! Charlie?

 

Excerpt

Sorry Charlie by Kimberly Murphy

 

CHAPTER ONE – THE LAST TIME

    Charlotte Monroe raced up the steps to her house, fumbling deep inside her oversized Chanel purse for her house keys.  What she once considered her favorite accessory now resembled a black hole rather than last year’s “must have” bag.  She felt her fingers graze over a wallet, a squeeze tube of lip gloss, several pens, chap stick, her make-up bag(which she realized was unzipped), her bronzer compact(that was supposed to be in said make-up bag) a few napkins and tissues, either a candy bar or energy bar(she couldn’t remember) but no keys.  She felt her chest grow tighter and heard her own breaths racing in time with her escalating pulse.  Had she taken them out of her purse at LT’s place?  NO! She told herself, you can’t possibly have left them there…that would mean going back and having to TALK to him because now he’s probably awake!  It was the last thing she wanted to do.  She had left him sleeping soundly, with nothing more than a note on the pillow.  No explanation, no waking him up to say goodbye, just a note. Would he even talk to me? Would he do something with my keys?!  She imagined him waking to find she had vanished, replaced by a note on her pillow that read simply, “Sorry! Charlie xo.” 

Novelicious Undiscovered - Twenty-Somewhere by Kristan Hoffman

Welcome to Writers Tuesday, and indeed the next installment of Novelicious Undiscovered - our showcase of unpublished chick lit writers. Remember, the excerpt that garners the most attention/positive comments will win a lovely award at the end of the year!

Our next excerpt is called Twenty-Somewhere and has been written by Kristan Hoffman. Please do comment, critique and have a good old read. Comments help the writer!

About The Series

Best friends Sophie, Claudia, and MJ have graduated college and are ready to take on the world! Or so they think. The Real World has other plans in mind.

Follow these young women – an advertising expert in Texas, a writer in the Midwest, and a scientist in England – as they each navigate their own set of work and relationship problems. Fun and friendship guaranteed!

Twenty-Somewhere is not a novel, exactly, but rather an episodic fiction series about three twenty-something best friends. Think of it as Sex and the City meets Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.

 New episodes are written weekly, and are available via Amazon for the Kindle/iPhone/iPod Touch. Check it out!

 

Excerpt

 

Episode 1: The New Diaspora

Three young women gather at the end of summer to say their goodbyes. Long-limbed Sophie is dressed for a tennis match and has plans to meet X at the courts right after this. She likes to keep busy. MJ sips from her cappuccino, licking foam off her top lip and evaluating the guys in the room. Believe it or not, she’s the nerd of the group. Last but not least is Claudia, late as always. She breezes into the café, spewing apologies in advance.

“Lose track of time working on the book?” MJ asks, scooting over to make room at the table.

“Not exactly,” Claudia says, taking a seat. Sophie hands her the smoothie they ordered in anticipation of her tardy arrival. “I spent all morning looking at pictures of puppies online! Eli found a great shelter near us, and they just got a new litter.”

MJ and Sophie shoot each other knowing looks. Claudia is a writer and has been working on her first novel for a over a year. Now that she’s graduated and is moving in with her boyfriend, she’ll supposedly have time to polish the manuscript and get it sold and published. But every time they ask how it’s going, she’s got a new distraction.

MJ changes the subject. “Ten hours till takeoff.”

Novelicious Undiscovered - Being Her by Ruby Whittaker

This is third entrant in our showcase of unpublished Chick Lit writers! Please do comment, critique etc, as this helps the writer to know how they are doing!

About the Author

Ruby Whittaker is 26 years old and currently resides in Halifax, West Yorkshire. By day she works in a call centre and by night she is a club singer. In between all this she adores writing fiction and dreaming up ideas for the perfect sunday roast.

Excerpt of Being Her by Ruby Whittaker

“   The grass may be greener on the other side of the fence but you still have to mow it…”

  (English Proverb) 

On a beer stained seat, in a dubious taproom, in a very average suburb of Manchester, I sit silently, and wonder how the hell a pub quiz became the high point of my life.  

Seriously. That kind of thing doesn’t just happen to a person. It creeps up on you over time, like a cupboard full of 1993’s baked beans, or a fat arse. It happens so slowly that there’s this curious disbelief when you eventually notice it.  

It’s like one minute you’re twenty four and anticipating a life of glamour and success and brilliant parties. The next your twenty-seven, a pub quiz champion and contemplating your entire existence.

 Don’t get me wrong. Up until about oooh two hours ago, I was happy with my life. Ok, not so much happy as generally satisfied. I have the worlds most undemanding job weighing packages at the post office, plus I’m getting married this year, and we just got Sky Plus installed with all the movie channels. So everything was simple.

 And then on the drive over here something happened. Nothing remarkable, I’d even go so far as to say it was incredibly unremarkable. But it was enough to send my head into a bit of a spin, so I should probably mention it.

So anyway, there we were (me and my fiancé), in the car over here, and we stopped at traffic lights outside some super trendy bar in the Northern Quarter. You know the type, all soft lighting and discreet signage so that no-one but the coolest people know where it is. And milling around outside the bar were this group of girls, all about my age, all drinking cocktails and all smoking cigarettes. They were dressed up in these tiny sparkly dresses, and giggling, and chattering and fizzy. And then this tall, really super glamorous blonde one turned around and caught my eye. Oh, and you should know that at that exact moment I was chomping into a Big Mac and had secret sauce on my chin. Well, we locked eyes for a moment, she got this weird pitying look on her face, and then off we drove.

 

Novelicious Undiscovered - Should Have Known Better by Nadine Matheson

 This is the second excerpt in our series of (as yet) unpublished chick lit writers! Please do read, comment, review, critique the piece and get some discussion going!

Should Have Known Better by Nadine Matheson

About The Book

This is the story of Lauren, Rianna and Maxine who endure a typical British summer where deceit and truth is brought into the light.

Lauren has devoted the past seven years to her Clayton but has trying to convince her family and friends that she’s in the perfect relationship finally taken it’s toll? She’s supported him through his all his failed business ventures and infidelities; so why is she with him?

Rianna’s motto has always been it’s just me myself and I but has she finally gone to far? Rianna is suddenly confronted with the repercussions of her ‘free spirited’ ways. what exactly is her problem? Because there must be something wrong. Has her bi-polar disorder affected her life more than she thought? However, the revelations of family secrets finally help Rianna see her life with clear eyes.


Maxine has finally reached the top of her ladder. She is now a professional woman. She’s done everything that’s been expected of her. She’s got the right job, the the riverside apartment, the car and she’s even got the man; much to her mother’s relief. So what’s the problem? Will Maxine discover, before it’s too late, that doing what is expected of her will mean that she walks away from being truly happy.

Excerpt

“Rianna!  Rianna.”

 The incessant banging on the front door and the shouts for Rianna had been growing increasingly louder over the last ten minutes.  Nathan was not happy.  Rianna sat in her bedroom, the room furthest away from the drama that was unfolding at her front door.  She had been laying face down on her bed with the pillow over her head trying to block out the shouts of a man whose boyfriend status had been relegated from current to ex in world record time.  Twenty minutes earlier Nathan had caught Rianna in a rather compromising position in the back of her Renault Megane with a man who was clearly not from the AA.  Rianna got up and closed her bedroom door.  Shit, she thought to herself.  How could she let this happen?  She was normally so careful; how could she get caught like that, in the back of her car in Burgess fucking park of all places.

 

Novelicious Undiscovered - Valentines Day Virgin by Cesca Martin

Super excited to have the first excerpt in our series of (as yet) unpublished chick lit writers! Please do read, comment, review, critique the piece and get some discussion going!

Valentines Day Virgin by Cesca Martin

About the Book

'Valentines Day Virgin' is about an uptight girl who takes on a bet that changes her life.  On discovering she has never had a date on Valentines Day her workmate challenges her to do ANYTHING she can do to secure a man for February 14th.  The heroine, Nicola takes the bet and treats it like any assignment she is given i.e. very seriously.  She throws her all into the task.  After blind dates, speed dates, internet dates things get even more chaotic.  Carpentry classes, fortune tellers, dog theft, make-overs, singles holiday - there is nothing Nicola won't try.  And by learning more about the cut throat world of dating, Nicole learns more about herself.

 

Excerpt

Valentines Day Virgin

I’m currently standing squashed up against two men.  Normally perhaps you might think this is a pretty positive, perhaps even exciting, position to be in.  It is not.  I am sweating (not in a sexy way), I’m in a queue, I’m in an airport and I don’t know the men.  I have also come to the recent conclusion that they are in fact together.  In the civil partnership sense of the word.  I can’t ask them however because I am quite literally jammed between them, a bag under my arm, suitcase by my side, and face crushed uncomfortably close to the leather jacket of Man #1 whilst Man #2 eyes me suspiciously.  I give him an awkward, helpless sort of grimace which is meant to convey that a) I am as unhappy in this situation as he is and b) I am not threatening to steal his gay lover at any time in the near future.  His eyes narrow and I try to widen mine into an even more innocent look that is meant to convey that I am not THAT kind of woman. I’m the non-threatening type me.  Now we just look like we are competing in an airport blinking contest and I drop my gaze and start blushing deeply instead. 

 

News on Novelicious Undiscovered

So the excerpts are rolling in VERY quickly (I've never had this many emails!) and the first will be up tomorrow, and then we will do one on every Tuesday until the end of the year.

Please do try to comment on other people's excerpts, that way you will be likely to get a better, more comprehensive response to yours!

No more than 1000 words from the BEGINNING of your OWN book, and feel free to send along any pictures, info, or website/twitter links you would like posting along with your excerpt!

Send your stuff to kirsty@novelicious.com, with Novelicious Undiscovered in the subject box!!

Cheers, and hurrah to all the budding chick lit writers out there!

Calling All Unpublished Chick Lit Writers! *Updated*

Are you writing contemporary, funny, female focused fiction? Are you unpublished?

Well, Novelicious is pleased to announce a brand new weekly feature - 'Novelicious Undiscovered' !

We are inviting unpublished wannabe authors to submit an excerpt of their work in progress to the site, for review and critique by our readers (strictly chick lit and contemporary women's fiction only).

It's a great way to showcase your writing, and as some of the UK's top publishers, book publicists, editors and agents regularly read the site - who knows - you might just get discovered!

For more info, or to send some writing, please email kirsty@novelicious.com with the subject header 'Novelicious Undiscovered'.

At the end of the year, the piece that has generated the most interest/comments from our readers will win a lovely Novelicious Award with a proper (very pretty) trophy and everything, as part of the end of year Novelicious Book Awards (more info on that coming soon).

Come on then - get writing!!

UPDATE - Excerpts must be from the beginning of your novel (i.e. chapter one) so that your writing (characters/storyline/etc)  is more clearly introduced to our readers and please send no more than 1000 words. Cheers! :)